Bubbles in my think tank

Sarah Markley Blog: The Best Days of My Life

I was going through Facebook this morning and a friend of mine from church posted about this blog. It's AWESOME! I'm always looking for new blogs to read and this one is definitely on my reading list now.

Yesterday I hiked in the canyon. The particular trail I took I hadn’t walked in over a year.

Things change in a year: bushes, landscapes, hills. I made a wrong turn, ended up startling a roadrunner and as a result of my bad memory had to double back wasting 20 minutes.

There were so many choices! And all the trail names sound the same: East Lake Loop, East Lake View, Lake Trail…

I mean I didn’t get hopelessly lost. There WAS the roadrunner, and a mountain biker who pedaled by me. I made it back to the main artery without much hassle, but I know I’ll never take that trail again.

Our road is never, ever straight. There are always forks, trails that lead into the forest, or paths that travel up or down hill. There are always decisions to be made, ruts to avoid and rattlesnakes to watch out for.

Keeping our marriages strong is a constant journey down a canyon trail making the right choices over and over again. Everything is in our way, at one time or another, to attempt to confuse or trip us.

Yesterday I wrote about emotional affairs, and it would seem they are much more common than I had ever thought. Just go read the comments.

It’s ridiculous to think that we can live our lives free from attraction to someone NOT our spouse. Even if you aren’t an oversexed woman, the man will come around someday who says just the right thing to get your attention.

And your ears will perk.

And you’ll think, ME??

If it hasn’t happened yet it will.

Just ask any man.

How do you avoid the double-back path? How do you make the right choices to stay on the true trail? How do you avoid an emotional attachment to someone other than your spouse?

1. Limit your “friendships” with members of the opposite gender. Understandably we must function in the world and world, thank God, is not just made up of women. (could. you. imagine?) But we can limit our close, tight, emotional one-to-one connections with members of the opposite gender.

2. Keep your heart focused on the right things. A heart focused on God will not stray. In fact, my husband Chad is writing about that today. Go hear what he has to say when you get a chance.

3. Recognize that attraction isn’t the problem… But prolonged thoughts about the attraction is. If you can’t stop thinking about someone, then there is definitely a problem. But simple gut attraction is something built into us as humans and is something nearly impossible to avoid. But recognize it for what it is and nothing more. Move on as quickly as possible if you find someone attractive.

4. Be honest with your spouse. If you don’t have it already, create an environment of emotional transparency so that when these feelings come up, or you feel like you might be headed to a dangerous place you can be open with him. You might be surprised to hear that he’s had these thoughts too.

The goal isn’t just to NOT GET LOST. But to stay found. Stay close to your spouse. Stay close to your Creator. Stay found by them.

What do you think? How do you avoid extramarital emotional attachments?

Posted by Sarah Markley of The Best Days of My Life

VERY good post!