I'm not really sure how his week has been. I think there are lots of emotions running through his head and his heart. Elation, Happiness, Sadness, Exhaustion, Weariness, Love, Anger...to name a few.
I sit here watching Train singing Soul Sister..I love that song but I can't stop thinking about the phone call I got from Ian this afternoon. He's exhausted. He's been in Baltimore on a mission trip with some of the students from our youth ministry. This week has changed his life...he told me so. So it's changed my life too. It happened so fast. He said that he sees his family completely different than he did before he left. He has seen some things in Baltimore that some kids never get to see. Children and families that are struggling. I think it broke his heart. He met a little boy, 11, who had walked in to his parents being murdered. I think it was those kinds of things that he saw all week. That breaks MY heart. You go your whole life raising a child that you want to love and protect and shelter from the bad things of the world. Then God leads them right into the middle of it. I'm sure it's been very emotional. I could tell when I talked to him today.
He left for Baltimore last Saturday and will be home tomorrow. After he left I had a nervous breakdown. No really. I would have been fine if I had been hooked up to an IV full of Valium. I knew this was coming. He's about to be a Senior in high school. I've always been the one that didn't worry about how fast my boys were growing and I giggled at Kathy and Shellie when they were upset over 'aging' children. I've loved this age of my boys. Never did I think I would have a nervous breakdown before Senior year. Ian left and it's like for the first time I saw him 'leaving for good'. He's almost a grown man and he will be going to COLLEGE next year at this time. 
O.M.G. My first little boy is not a little boy anymore. My heart is breaking.Sorry for all the broken sentences.
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